TXT

Perhaps it's because I'm thirty, but text messages baffle me. I understand that using the T9 function (it automatically types words for you!) is thinly veiled witchcraft, but the alternative is a complete butchering of the English language, no - sodomizing of it.

For example, I have seen the txt phrase "ur" used several times in my life. Is this supposed to be "your" or "you're"? These are two completely different words that would ultimately baffle the receiver of my txt. It may further raise their blood pressure as they realize that they've paid ten cents to their cell phone provider, only to be confused by my message.

Clearly rules need to be put in place and from now on "ur" is "your", whilst "u'r" is "you're". Or you could stop being a lazy bastard and type the whole word like a civilized human being. Or, now stay with me on this one, you could actually use the phone for what it's supposed to do, which is call someone live and in person.

Also, anyone using "lol" as a cheap substitute for "laugh out loud" is going to get an IOU for a "PIF" which is a cheap substitute for "punch in face."