The Super Awesome Adventures of A. Jonathan Cox
I rule. I rule so hard that I had both the Fire Department AND the Police Department at my house today. That's right sucka-faces! I roll two public services deep! Apparently one of our water pipes (not a bong) exploded and spent the rest of the afternoon spraying water all over the inside of my garage. The water, as I imagined it, was like the water show at the Bellagio, but with less music.
I'm not sure how the Fire Department got involved as this is the exact opposite of a fire, but nonetheless, they broke into my house (via a very long ladder and a slightly ajar window). From there they let their cohorts, the Police, in through the front door. It's an ingenious scheme really. The fuzz, using their top notch detective skills, found my wife's phone number in her check book that was on the counter.
About twenty minutes later I bombed into my driveway and parked next to the cops. They gave me the low down, wished me good luck and then went home to their houses that are not flooded. And I spent the rest of the afternoon calling plumbers and water cleaner uppers.
Several lessons were learned...
(1) When a plumber says "yeah, we can have someone out there tonight and totally save the day, no problem, you can count on me," what they really mean is "I'll tell you what you want to hear and then someone from my office will call you to reschedule because I don't know what I'm talking about. "
(2) When the water cleaner-upper says "yeah, we can have someone out there tonight and totally save the day, no problem, you can count on me," what they really mean is "I'll tell you what you want to hear and then someone from my office will call you to reschedule because I don't know what I'm talking about."
(3) The water pipe (not a bong) that leads to the spout on the side of my garage actually runs through the uninsulated attic, and not through the insulated wall like I thought. Huh. Who knew?
(4) The mysterious blue knob on the other side of my garage actually shuts the water off to aforementioned pipe. Huh. Who knew?
(5) I rule harder than I previously thought.
I'm not sure how the Fire Department got involved as this is the exact opposite of a fire, but nonetheless, they broke into my house (via a very long ladder and a slightly ajar window). From there they let their cohorts, the Police, in through the front door. It's an ingenious scheme really. The fuzz, using their top notch detective skills, found my wife's phone number in her check book that was on the counter.
About twenty minutes later I bombed into my driveway and parked next to the cops. They gave me the low down, wished me good luck and then went home to their houses that are not flooded. And I spent the rest of the afternoon calling plumbers and water cleaner uppers.
Several lessons were learned...
(1) When a plumber says "yeah, we can have someone out there tonight and totally save the day, no problem, you can count on me," what they really mean is "I'll tell you what you want to hear and then someone from my office will call you to reschedule because I don't know what I'm talking about. "
(2) When the water cleaner-upper says "yeah, we can have someone out there tonight and totally save the day, no problem, you can count on me," what they really mean is "I'll tell you what you want to hear and then someone from my office will call you to reschedule because I don't know what I'm talking about."
(3) The water pipe (not a bong) that leads to the spout on the side of my garage actually runs through the uninsulated attic, and not through the insulated wall like I thought. Huh. Who knew?
(4) The mysterious blue knob on the other side of my garage actually shuts the water off to aforementioned pipe. Huh. Who knew?
(5) I rule harder than I previously thought.
posted by A. Jonathan Cox at 6:03 PM
2 Comments:
I am so sorry! That sucks especially at this time of year... we had our water main break a couple of weeks ago but it broke under the driveway and was just leaking into the ground. We found a really great plumber. He came out so fast it was almost scary. Top Guy Plumbing - ask for Al he will most likely answer the phone.
that is NOT awesome, Mr Cox. NOT awesome at all. Does this mean you get to stay home from work today though? :)
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